Chapter 27: The Staring Contest I Never Signed Up For
Chapter 27: The Staring Contest I Never Signed Up For
Chapter 27: Chapter 27: The Staring Contest I Never Signed Up For
And so, because of that I am currently running away, I left Scarface behind as co leader again(・∀・)
Anyway, as I jogged away from the village, I remembered something Scarface said from before.
"Some of the females relocated somewhere in the forest."@@@@
Back then, I thought he meant they got sick of the guys, packed their stuff, and went their merry way into the forest to do... whatever it is ogres do, I wouldn't know.
But now, seeing the bustling village, it hit me.
"This is what he meant!" (•o•)!
-----
Anyway, let's go back to how I got here!
As I said, leaving Scarface to lead the construction project (and silently praying they wouldn't accidentally flatten each other with logs), I grabbed my creatively crafted map, waved a dramatic goodbye, and set off to explore the western side of the forest, which Scarface scowled at but let's pretend I didn't see that (" ̅. ̅)
"Alright, forest," I muttered as I adjusted the tiny satchel I'd made out of torn cloth and vine straps. "Let's see what you've got for me today."
The west hadn't been explored until now, mostly 'cause I was busy avoiding the big squirrels up north, being killed by muddy swamp monsters down south or getting bitten by wolves on the east. But today, I was prepared. Brave. A fearless pioneer ready for adventure!
"ψ(`∇ ́)ψ
Well, kind of. At least as much as a small ogre would look.
Anyway Yipee, now I'm free from those guys back at camp!
I'm definitely not using scouting as a way to escape the tribes moronity, uh-hum.
(҂⌣_⌣)
After walking for a while—stepping over roots, dodging suspicious mushrooms that I swear hissed at me—I stopped dead in my tracks.
Why?
Because there it was.
A creature I'd only heard of in chicken legends: a cockatrice.
Imagine the unholy union of a chicken and a snake—fluffy wings, razor-sharp talons, a snake-like tail that hissed at me like a person looks at the rent collector every month, and those beady little eyes that burned with murderous intent.
We stared at each other.
And kept staring.
Me: tiny and unarmed.
It: chicken-shaped nightmare fuel.
It was as if the universe had organized the world's most intense staring contest and forgot to ask me if I wanted to participate.
I guess they'd know I'd say, Hell No! (-_-)
The cockatrice blinked once. I swear its eyelid made a schlickk noise.
"Uh... good chicken?" I offered hesitantly. I mean, what am I supposed to do with a chicken that's atleast two times the size of Boulder?!
It tilted its head, like it was contemplating my worth. I almost sighed in relief until—
"Bgook!!"
"You're not wrong," I admitted. Wait, maybe these ones don't like the goons back at mine, that would just ruin opportunity so....
"I've got a group of, uh... fellow monsters. We're building a camp, but we're in desperate need of armor and tools. I was wondering if you—"
"No freebies," she interrupted, pointing the hammer at me like it was a sword. "We don't work for free."
I held up my hands in surrender. "Totally fair! I wouldn't ask you to. But what if we trade? My group—big guys, strong guys—could help gather materials, hunt, or build. You name it, and I'll make sure it gets done."
The kobold narrowed her eyes. "You're tiny. How do I know you can deliver?"
Oof. I am tiny. But I have brains, and I'll make up for my lack of brawn with sheer audacity.
"Tell you what," I said, puffing out my chest (still didn't help my height).
"I'll prove it. Give me a task—anything—and I'll show you just how capable I am."
She smirked, sharp teeth glinting. "Anything, huh?"
Uh-oh, I feel like Future me is saying I'm gonna regret this
( ́・_・`)
"Bring back 3 cockatrice feather," she said casually.
My blood froze. My eye twitched. What?
"Three... cockatrice feathers?" I repeated slowly, as if my ears betrayed me.
"You heard me. Prove yourself, little merchant. Or don't come back."
I forced a laugh, my confidence cracking. "Oh, you mean the terrifying snake-chicken that tried to turn me into lunch five minutes ago? That cockatrice?"
The kobold grinned wickedly. "Problem?"
"Nope!" I squeaked. "No problem at all! Hahahaha!"
---
As I turned to leave, I muttered to myself:
"This is fine. Totally fine. Just have to outwit the demon chicken from earlier and pluck a few feathers. How hard can it be?"
The forest rustled ominously as if to answer my question.
"I'm so dead," I groaned.
The kobold waved at me, looking far too smug. "Good luck, little merchant! Try not to die!"
"Try not to—" I stopped myself.
"You know what? Fine. I'll be back. With feathers. Just you wait!"
---
System Prompt:
"New Quest Acquired: Chicken Run - Retrieve 3 Cockatrice Feathers. Difficulty: You're Doomed."
"Thanks for the vote of confidence," I grumbled at the invisible system.
And so, with a fake smile plastered on my face and dread in my heart, I marched back into the forest, preparing myself for Round Two with the world's deadliest chicken.
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