Chapter 100 Weak
Chapter 100 Weak
She could hardly believe Esmeralda had pulled that off - doing that with her, of all things, even though she was pregnant. Though, honestly, she had to admit, it felt pretty great. Plus, it was a nice little detour from her spiraling thoughts, a momentary escape from the abyss.
— [Intimacy Points +30]
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— [New Relationship Status: Esmeralda Morrigan]Nôv(el)B\\jnn
— [Affection ▪︎ 30]
— [Loyalty▪︎ 30]
— [Intimacy▪︎ 80]
— [Emotion▪︎ 100]
"Looking at her, sleeping so soundly..." she groaned, eyes narrowing at the empress, who was practically floating on clouds after that. Most of their relationship had become so physical at this point, like a routine. No depth, no heart. Just... well, the physical. But with Faeralys? She'd never crossed that line with the girl.
Now, with the pregnancy and all, she couldn't help but wonder how on earth she was going to handle that with all her wives.
They were all so different, each one with her own needs, and her growing belly wasn't exactly making things easier.
But then came the big question, how was she going to navigate this?
She was pregnant now, with all of her wives waiting for her to somehow balance the impossible.
Each one had their own expectations, their own needs, and right now, she felt completely overwhelmed by it all. How would she keep everything together?
"And I'm still weak. Still so damn weak that everyone has to protect me!" The sword whistled through the air again, a violent arc that only seemed to emphasize how helpless she truly felt. She could hear the echo of each unspoken truth in her words.
She wasn't strong enough. Not even close.
"What's with this damn magic bestowal bullshit?! I can't even bestow anything!" She spat the words as if they tasted bitter on her tongue. "All I do is activate magic! Activate it, and nothing more! And how the hell can I bestow anything when I don't even understand it?! I don't know a damn thing about it!" Her swing was so forceful this time that the wooden blade splintered in her hands, the jagged end of it biting into her palms before it snapped clean in half.
She stood there for a moment, her breath ragged, the broken pieces of the sword in her hands reflecting the same feeling of shattered pieces inside her.
The silence that followed was heavy, as if the world itself had paused to absorb her fury.
She stared down at the remnants of the weapon, feeling the burn of both physical exertion and the deep frustration that had consumed her. It wasn't supposed to be this way.
Everything felt so out of control.
Her frustration was like a storm, and then, poof! Aa tiny meow sounded behind her. She whipped around in surprise, her heart leaping into her throat, only to see Alvator, her cheeky, self-assured cat guide, lounging lazily on a nearby rock.
"You've got to be kidding me," she muttered, half-relieved, half-annoyed. "Can't I just have one quiet moment?"
Alvator stretched, yawning dramatically, and gave her a smug look. "And here I thought you'd be over the whole self-pity routine by now, Argider."
"I'm not pitying myself, Alvator, I'm frustrated!"
"Mmhm, I can tell," he purred with mock sweetness. He flicked his tail and jumped down from his perch with a graceful, almost theatrical leap. "It's cute, really. But you do know the reason you can't bestow magic, right?"
"Oh, do enlighten me, wise and all-knowing cat."
He sat down, looking at her with his ever-so-dramatic gaze, as if preparing for some deep, life-changing revelation. "You can't bestow magic because you don't understand it yet. You need full comprehension of it. Only then can you actually channel it to others."
"How am I supposed to understand magic when it's barely even practiced anymore? I mean, sure, the Spectre Council's got their thing going on, but I hate those guys! And besides," she waved her hand around, "magic's practically a relic at this point."
"You do realize you're talking to someone who has lived through millennia of history, right? Magic hasn't disappeared. It's just... quieted. And about the Spectre Council, well, they're a bit of a mess. But that doesn't mean you can't start learning from what little you know. You just need to open your eyes and your mind."
"And don't get me started on my role. Everyone's always looking at me to give them more power! Like I'm just some walking support bot! It's so frustrating! I don't want to just activate other people's magic!"
Alvator rolled his eyes so hard she almost heard it. "Argider, there's actually more to your skill than you know.
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